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I finally got in to see the Endocrinologist last Monday. It was a really good experience--I felt like the doctor actually listened to me. She spent a good 40 minutes just talking to me and explaining things. Some interesting things she had to say:
1. There is very little that doctors actually know and understand about weight gain and hormones. There is often no identifiable reason for unexplained weight gain. Yay for me!
2. Just because something worked before (i.e. Body for Life) doesn't mean it will work again. Well that explains the last year of my life.
3. The older we get the harder it is for us to keep the weight off. I guess I knew that--kinda sucks though.
4. Anti-anxiety medications can cause weight gain.
5. While exercise is great, all it really boils down to is calories in/calories out.
6. You can gain weight eating too much broccoli.

She decided to re-test my thyroid, even though the test came back normal in October. She had my charts right there in front of her and nicely pointed out that yes, I have gained 12 pounds since October. That doesn't count the 18 or so pounds I had put on before October. (So, while I appreciate all of the kind comments from those of you who have said I look fine--I have proof from my doctor that I have put on a TON.)

She also decided to test my cortisol levels because she said that was the only other identifiable cause of unexplained weight gain. She made it pretty clear that it was unlikely that either of these hormones were out of whack. She says she often sees patients that have nothing wrong (that they can find) and suggested I start counting calories. I left feeling somewhat bummed that there wasn't going to be any magic pill to cure me, but also encouraged that at least I had a game plan.

I have spent the past week limiting myself to under 1200 calories a day. I found a great website--myfitnesspal.com that helps me track my calories--the food I eat and the calories I burn working out. Yes, I have been at least vaguely hungry most of the time, but I have felt in control and I like working toward a goal. I have a lot to lose. I also met with my regular doctor and got my anti-anxiety meds switched to see if those could be contributing to the problem. (Yes, I am a crazy person. Now you know.)

Well, lo and behold, the endocrinologist called today with my test results. My thyroid is still completely normal, but my cortisol test came back abnormal, so now I have to go back in for more tests.

So--maybe there is something wrong with me. I don't really know what it is or what they can do about it. I will go back in and talk to her more soon. But I have to say I find it a lot less depressing to think that it is not my fault that I have gained all this weight! It's not my fault!!! :)